Gina gave me the "Glass Palace" by Amitav Ghosh as a way of introducing me to her father's Burma. It's an epic novel that leverages the lives of three generations of Burmese and Indians to illustrate the tumultuous economic, social and political changes in southeast Asia from the 1800's when Burma's king was ousted from power, to modern day Myanmar.
I was eager to dive into "The Glass Palace" because I wanted to get a glimpse into a dear friend's background. Her recent attempts to return to her father's homeland have been foiled by political unrest and so I was keen to "study up" on Burma to be more in the know and as she suggested, get inspired to eventually explore the country with her as my guide. I expected the book to connect me to Gina's inner Burmese, but it didn't. Instead I found myself reflecting more on Gina's maternal heritage, her relationship with her mother (who isn't Burmese) and her amazing daughter, Charlotte.
One of the main characters in "The Glass Palace" is Dolly, nursemaid to the Second Princess. She is an exquisite beauty, stunning and breathtaking, yet unaware that she is. So too, is my friend Gina. Yet, unlike my Gina, Dolly is passive, accepting life's circumstances without challenge or verve. This changes dramatically though, when her child falls ill. Dolly's resolve and determination to support her sick son through recovery again reminded me of my dear friend.
Gina's daughter Charlotte came into the world early, very early. Born at about 1.5 pounds, the Rayfield Peanut was frail and tiny and as you'd expect, her premature arrival transformed what was supposed to be a joyous time for her family into a frightening one. Strangely, nearly thirteen years later and because of a nudge I received from Dolly in "The Glass Palace", I find myself drifting back to that period that forever transformed my friend's life.
Naturally, we were focused on Charlotte's condition, never expecting things to get hairy for Gina. Yet, as her newborn daughter was being cared for in the NICU, Gina started to bleed and bleed and bleed and late at night, was whisked from her room straight into emergency surgery. As just one support entity nearby for the family, our focus was on Mike, Gina's husband. It's not necessary to recall the details of the discussions we shared during that difficult time, but suffice it to say the man adores his wife -- as he should!
Interestingly, "The Glass Palace" has forced me to change the lens on how I look back on Charlotte's birth. Having just read about Burma, Malaysia and India through the eyes of child, parent and grandparent, I began to reflect on that crisis from the perspective of Gina's mom. How did Lynn keep it together when in a flash, both her "baby" and "grandbaby" were in a fight for their lives? I wrack my memory to recapture the images I have of Lynn at the hospital, talking to Mike and other visitors, so calm and strong. I imagine how I'd have handled the situation if I were in her shoes. Since I'm sure I'd have been a blubbering baboon, I am convinced I've screwed something up on my recall.
But, I know I haven't. Just like Dolly, I now understand that Lynn dug in deep and tapped into her Momma strength, something powerful and mighty. And magically, or genetically, she's passed that inner courage onto her daughter.
For the last 13 years, I've been blown away by Gina's resolve. It's almost as if she, like Dolly, has a spiritual connection that powers her tenacity and it's that drive that has helped transform the Nut into Charlotte, the beautiful, talented, delightful and bigger than life preteen that she is today. Yes, Charlotte has had her share of issues due to her premature start to life, but Gina helps her daughter simply take it day by day. And because of that, Charlotte has the very best -- care, experiences, opportunity, and dreams a child could ever have.
I look ahead ten, fifteen or twenty years from now -- to when we get to watch Charlotte find her way as a Mom. I can't wait to experience the deja vu moments we'll enjoy recalling the history of her maternal line as Charlotte taps into her own inner courage to fight for her babes. When it's time, remind me to tell the Rayfields, I want a front row seat to enjoy the show.
Friday, March 18, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Recipes for a LIfetime
I love food. I love to smell it, eat it, think about it, and share it. So, Kate's book selection, Tender on the Bone, was a perfect recommendation for my Cinquenta List. It's a memoir by Ruth Reichl, Gourmet's editor in chief and former food critic for the NY Times. The story is a simple one; people throughout her life shaped Ruth's love for cooking and food. From childhood through adulthood, there is an individual, story and correlating recipe.
For years, my personal collection of food memories were housed in a manila folder I jammed in with my cookbooks. One year, my daughter Julia gave me the perfect Mothers' Day gift -- she carefully organized my mess in a hand-decorated binder she entitled "Mom's Old & New Recipes and Experiments". In it sit my treasures, prized possessions I've collected from friends and family that shape virtually every special meal I prepare -- a simple dessert to welcome a child home, a dinner to enjoy with friends from out of town, a massive holiday feast or a menu to feed 50 to ring in the new year! The book grows each year with new food ideas that are forever tied to the people who've shared them with me.
I browse my collection lovingly. My grandmother's apple cake, banana bread, and famous cookie recipes are there, all handwritten on now-faded legal paper. GG was our family's great baker. She came to visit us in California when she was 95 years old and one day when we were enjoying some downtime, I asked her to her select her favorite desserts I could pass on to my children. I assumed she'd go home, find the recipes and then send me her top selections, but instead, she simply asked for paper and a pencil and spent the next 20 minutes jotting them down for me. 95 Years Old. 6 Recipes. By Heart.
My mother was an INCREDIBLE cook. Two of her specialties are in my binder and I cherish them for the recipes themselves, as well as for the paper they are written on and the memories they illicit. The first one she sent upon my request. It was for her killer white chocolate cheese cake (which is to die for!), which she hastily scribbled on the back of an old wedding invitation. Faded card stock, formal engraved letters documenting my cousin's second attempt at marriage immortalizes the dessert my mom first made when she invited Jeff's parents over to dinner to celebrate our engagement!
I'm the guilty scribbler of my mom's other contribution to the food binder. It was our first Thanksgiving and I wanted to impress my mother-in-law. Mom dictated the recipe for her pumpkin bread over the phone which I captured under the masthead of a now defunct ad agency, Wooding & Housely, the firm that gave me my start in marketing. The recipe brings me back to a moment in time and that, along with that yummy bread, is priceless to me.
My blog is no book -- but I'll follow Ruth's lead by using the medium to share the food that has shaped my life. Below are my Top 25 .....if you want the recipe, let me know and I'll send them. Enjoy....
1. Kate's Cheese Dips (I have two). I brought my dear friend's curry/chutney dish to a holiday party this year and two women came up to me raving about it. (It really is one of those creations that when you start with a taste, you just can't stop eating, eating, eating.) The small world connection was that both of the dip's admirers knew Kate (who had moved to Minneapolis years earlier) and when I credited her as the rightful owner of the appetizer glory, we then spent the next 30 minutes enjoying wonderful Kate and Barry stories. I love how food does that!
2. Aunt Pat's Chicken Wings. Her daughter explained the prep secret to me......"cook the shit out of them".
3. My sister's cook books. The best in my own cookbook collection are from Ellen. Hundreds of yummy treats from my big sister's talents, creativity and passion for all things food-related!
4. Mary's Spinach recipe. Not healthy, but so, so yummy. I make it nearly every Thanksgiving.
5. Gina's Gumbo. My version paled in comparison to hers, but my mother and grandmother weren't from New Orleans. Gina's were, so great gumbo is in this woman's DNA. Clearly, not mine. What Gina can do with gumbo, her husband Mike can do in a smoker. It's kind of pointless eating ribs or pork butt if Mike hasn't prepared them, so I don't bother, but I have tried to recreate some of his sauces and those attempts/formulas are captured in my book.
6. Bob's Crabcakes. Basically, anything Bob Blasing makes is incredible, but these are off the charts, the BEST crabcake I have ever, ever, ever tasted. Astounding.
7. Judy's Grammy Angie's cookies, but we call them Judy Kaufman's cookies. Again, my version SUCKS compared to hers, but I make them every year, and my kids devour them. Thanks Judy.
8. Danielle's Lemon Cake. Frozen, light, lovely. The crust (made with graham crackers and pretzels) is the best on the planet.
9. Carol Sack's Nana's Brisket. I grew up in a Jewish household, but couldn't crack the "melt in your mouth" brisket code. Until I saw this on Carol Sack's facebook page.
10. Regina's Pavlova. Who knew I could make something so elegant? (Not my forte) One of my favorite desserts for a summer dinner, of all time.
11. Erika's Chicken and Date concoction. When she said, "it's so good, you could eat it for days", she was spot on.
12. Amy's Date/Bacon appetizer. Obscene.
13. Michelle's, arugula, goat cheese, prosciutto appetizer. More obscene.
14. Chocolate Souffle's. Sadly, I don't know who gave me this recipe. It's an easy to make, easy to impress, dramatic dessert. A staple in my book.
15. Deanne's Beef Tenderloin with chimichurri sauce I love this dish -- it's spicy and smoky and devour-able. I was introduced to it, along with Scott's Pomegranite Martini's at a fun-filled dinner with some of my favorite people in the world.
16. Grandma Dot's Peanut Butter Blossom cookies. These are basic peanut butter cookies with a Hershey kiss on top. My mother-in-law gets the credit for this recipe because she gave me the cookbook that features it and because my brother-in-law devours the cookies every time he visits us at Thanksgiving. Dot was a HORRENDOUS cook, so this is the only attribution to a good recipe the woman will ever get! (Though in fairness, she made killer mashed potatoes (we all miss them!) and "podada salad".....that's Boston for potato salad.)
17. Angie's Popeye Pancakes. One cup flour, one cup milk, 6 eggs and lots of butter. Lemon and powder sugar. Breakfast heaven.
18. Mary Alice's Peanut Butter/Chocolate Balls. Dottie's dear friend was a beautiful baker. We used to visit with her late on Christmas Eve and enjoy what was left over from her family feast.....This is one of my favorites: peanut butter, sugar, butter, chocolate. Need I say more?
19. Claudia's Cobbler recipe -- delivered with apricots grown from the Westrum's yard. What's better than that?
20. Shanan's Cranberry and Chocolate Chip Biscotti. I got these when I was at TiVo and still love 'em.
21. DD's Butternut Squash Soup. Lot of prep work, but oh so worth it....I wish I had some right now!
22. Nana's Welsh Cookies. Emily Cashen wasn't a great cook -- the woman almost poisoned me when I was 8 months pregnant with Bobby (I will never eat corned beef again), but Welsh Cookies are tied to generations of Cashen lore, so I include them here.
23. Home-made Mud Pie. My creation, but a Thanksgiving tradition my children and their friends won't let me break. When in doubt, add more chocolate.
24. Carol's Toffee Brittle. Carol was an admin in Jeff's office in the early TI days -- back in Boston. Butter, sugar, chocolate and pecans. Easy to make and even easier to eat.
25. Grilled Asparagus, Basil and Parmesan. Jim Pena whipped these up on the grill in our early California days. Throw balsamic vinegar in the mix and you're set. My daughter will eat this from now, until the end of time.
For years, my personal collection of food memories were housed in a manila folder I jammed in with my cookbooks. One year, my daughter Julia gave me the perfect Mothers' Day gift -- she carefully organized my mess in a hand-decorated binder she entitled "Mom's Old & New Recipes and Experiments". In it sit my treasures, prized possessions I've collected from friends and family that shape virtually every special meal I prepare -- a simple dessert to welcome a child home, a dinner to enjoy with friends from out of town, a massive holiday feast or a menu to feed 50 to ring in the new year! The book grows each year with new food ideas that are forever tied to the people who've shared them with me.
I browse my collection lovingly. My grandmother's apple cake, banana bread, and famous cookie recipes are there, all handwritten on now-faded legal paper. GG was our family's great baker. She came to visit us in California when she was 95 years old and one day when we were enjoying some downtime, I asked her to her select her favorite desserts I could pass on to my children. I assumed she'd go home, find the recipes and then send me her top selections, but instead, she simply asked for paper and a pencil and spent the next 20 minutes jotting them down for me. 95 Years Old. 6 Recipes. By Heart.
My mother was an INCREDIBLE cook. Two of her specialties are in my binder and I cherish them for the recipes themselves, as well as for the paper they are written on and the memories they illicit. The first one she sent upon my request. It was for her killer white chocolate cheese cake (which is to die for!), which she hastily scribbled on the back of an old wedding invitation. Faded card stock, formal engraved letters documenting my cousin's second attempt at marriage immortalizes the dessert my mom first made when she invited Jeff's parents over to dinner to celebrate our engagement!
I'm the guilty scribbler of my mom's other contribution to the food binder. It was our first Thanksgiving and I wanted to impress my mother-in-law. Mom dictated the recipe for her pumpkin bread over the phone which I captured under the masthead of a now defunct ad agency, Wooding & Housely, the firm that gave me my start in marketing. The recipe brings me back to a moment in time and that, along with that yummy bread, is priceless to me.
My blog is no book -- but I'll follow Ruth's lead by using the medium to share the food that has shaped my life. Below are my Top 25 .....if you want the recipe, let me know and I'll send them. Enjoy....
1. Kate's Cheese Dips (I have two). I brought my dear friend's curry/chutney dish to a holiday party this year and two women came up to me raving about it. (It really is one of those creations that when you start with a taste, you just can't stop eating, eating, eating.) The small world connection was that both of the dip's admirers knew Kate (who had moved to Minneapolis years earlier) and when I credited her as the rightful owner of the appetizer glory, we then spent the next 30 minutes enjoying wonderful Kate and Barry stories. I love how food does that!
2. Aunt Pat's Chicken Wings. Her daughter explained the prep secret to me......"cook the shit out of them".
3. My sister's cook books. The best in my own cookbook collection are from Ellen. Hundreds of yummy treats from my big sister's talents, creativity and passion for all things food-related!
4. Mary's Spinach recipe. Not healthy, but so, so yummy. I make it nearly every Thanksgiving.
5. Gina's Gumbo. My version paled in comparison to hers, but my mother and grandmother weren't from New Orleans. Gina's were, so great gumbo is in this woman's DNA. Clearly, not mine. What Gina can do with gumbo, her husband Mike can do in a smoker. It's kind of pointless eating ribs or pork butt if Mike hasn't prepared them, so I don't bother, but I have tried to recreate some of his sauces and those attempts/formulas are captured in my book.
6. Bob's Crabcakes. Basically, anything Bob Blasing makes is incredible, but these are off the charts, the BEST crabcake I have ever, ever, ever tasted. Astounding.
7. Judy's Grammy Angie's cookies, but we call them Judy Kaufman's cookies. Again, my version SUCKS compared to hers, but I make them every year, and my kids devour them. Thanks Judy.
8. Danielle's Lemon Cake. Frozen, light, lovely. The crust (made with graham crackers and pretzels) is the best on the planet.
9. Carol Sack's Nana's Brisket. I grew up in a Jewish household, but couldn't crack the "melt in your mouth" brisket code. Until I saw this on Carol Sack's facebook page.
10. Regina's Pavlova. Who knew I could make something so elegant? (Not my forte) One of my favorite desserts for a summer dinner, of all time.
11. Erika's Chicken and Date concoction. When she said, "it's so good, you could eat it for days", she was spot on.
12. Amy's Date/Bacon appetizer. Obscene.
13. Michelle's, arugula, goat cheese, prosciutto appetizer. More obscene.
14. Chocolate Souffle's. Sadly, I don't know who gave me this recipe. It's an easy to make, easy to impress, dramatic dessert. A staple in my book.
15. Deanne's Beef Tenderloin with chimichurri sauce I love this dish -- it's spicy and smoky and devour-able. I was introduced to it, along with Scott's Pomegranite Martini's at a fun-filled dinner with some of my favorite people in the world.
16. Grandma Dot's Peanut Butter Blossom cookies. These are basic peanut butter cookies with a Hershey kiss on top. My mother-in-law gets the credit for this recipe because she gave me the cookbook that features it and because my brother-in-law devours the cookies every time he visits us at Thanksgiving. Dot was a HORRENDOUS cook, so this is the only attribution to a good recipe the woman will ever get! (Though in fairness, she made killer mashed potatoes (we all miss them!) and "podada salad".....that's Boston for potato salad.)
17. Angie's Popeye Pancakes. One cup flour, one cup milk, 6 eggs and lots of butter. Lemon and powder sugar. Breakfast heaven.
18. Mary Alice's Peanut Butter/Chocolate Balls. Dottie's dear friend was a beautiful baker. We used to visit with her late on Christmas Eve and enjoy what was left over from her family feast.....This is one of my favorites: peanut butter, sugar, butter, chocolate. Need I say more?
19. Claudia's Cobbler recipe -- delivered with apricots grown from the Westrum's yard. What's better than that?
20. Shanan's Cranberry and Chocolate Chip Biscotti. I got these when I was at TiVo and still love 'em.
21. DD's Butternut Squash Soup. Lot of prep work, but oh so worth it....I wish I had some right now!
22. Nana's Welsh Cookies. Emily Cashen wasn't a great cook -- the woman almost poisoned me when I was 8 months pregnant with Bobby (I will never eat corned beef again), but Welsh Cookies are tied to generations of Cashen lore, so I include them here.
23. Home-made Mud Pie. My creation, but a Thanksgiving tradition my children and their friends won't let me break. When in doubt, add more chocolate.
24. Carol's Toffee Brittle. Carol was an admin in Jeff's office in the early TI days -- back in Boston. Butter, sugar, chocolate and pecans. Easy to make and even easier to eat.
25. Grilled Asparagus, Basil and Parmesan. Jim Pena whipped these up on the grill in our early California days. Throw balsamic vinegar in the mix and you're set. My daughter will eat this from now, until the end of time.
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